I always liked anime. I mean, the character design was different and their Saturday morning shows were always interesting. The unique drawing style was nice but I just never got into the whole anime culture, you know?
After leaving a project online, I got used to the company of a group of friends I had made there. (I’m still not entirely sure how it happened.) Nevertheless, these were great people, but they would always discuss some random anime/manga/game that I have not watched/read/played. I don’t have a problem with that, but it often gets me thinking about my own small tastes in the otaku world.
I remember the first manga I read was Fruits Basket. To be honest, what made me pick it up in the first place was the cute character and animals drawn on the cover. A lot of manga covers depicted a dramatic fight scene or something like that but the cover of Fruits Basket seemed oddly … peaceful. Peacefulness… yeah, maybe that’s the type of story I like best. I liked the whole turn-into-animals thing in Furuba, but I think what I liked most was the scenery, mood, and atmosphere. Experiencing something like that… it made me want to write this today.
A friend recently got me into a manga/anime called Mahoraba. Its story is different from Furuba’s, but the atmosphere, mood, and character interaction is very similar (at least in my eyes). The story itself is a light-hearted, slice-of-life styled presentation with an important spin: one of the major, lovable, characters has Multi-Personality Disorder. (Honestly, that makes me wonder about myself, what with roleplaying five characters and all~). Regardless, the story is full of carefree characters who are unique in their own way. A lot of time is spent watching the characters frolic and struggle with their emotions of affection over each other. To read such a story makes me happy, but inevitably comparing it to my life makes me feel slightly… lacking. It’s a weird feeling; is this how old people feel?
I’m not getting lost in a fantasy world or anything, but I really wish I had an opportunity to live like them… not just that manga but also like in others with similarly portrayed lifestyles. It’s just… that I’ve always really looked out for my own, save for my parents. My grade school education was spent mostly moving around from place to place, my parents are from one culture but I was raised surrounded by another, my school performance is imperative to pursue the field of study I am aiming for… etc. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining at all; This is who I am. Still though, reading or watching manga/anime like that leaves me slightly down as if I am missing something in my own life. Part of me, the logical side of me, says that such a lifestyle is mere fantasy in this world. A product of modern romanticization of everyday life. But still, a part of me wants that feeling of carefreeness, maybe slight ignorance, and the innocent courting between two teenagers. I mean, I’m the same age as the people in these stories, just not doing the same thing.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to become some weird NEET or do something I shouldn’t. I just sometimes feel like I’ve missed out due to relocating from place to place all the time and stuff. Thanks to the internet, I can experience what I’ve missed, such as staying with a group of friends and not moving away from them (who I am very thankful for), but I also desire for this to occur in my real life. I mean, living a fantasy life in an MMO is a great way to unwind and relax in real life, but doing so also inspires people to make their lives just as enjoyable… and that’s the best effect of all.
Moving has always been beyond my control, but now that I am heading to a new college campus, all of a sudden, I’ll be in total control. I hope that I will be able to enjoy as well as meet my academic expectations because I know all my family and friends is with me on this. I will be online from time to time, and I know they will be waiting. But until then…
~Gone off to find myself. Hope to be back soon!